I GET MY MONEY FOR NOTHING AND MY CHICKS FOR FREE!
Remember: it can always get worse.
Hey, at least you still have your ice cream:
And your cooking tray:
And... your forehead:
I mean, look at the brightside: you still have your toilet:
Your grapes are still intact:
And you don't look like a big ol' donut:
There aren't any statues about to fall on you:
You didn't send this email:
And you and your dentist didn't get a liiiittle too close:
Never forget that you aren't this person:
Or this person:
And, hey, this isn't your doll:
And you aren't sleeping in a corn bed tonight:
And, thankfully, you're not Taiwan Jones:
If all else fails, just say to yourself: at least my family didn't put me on a mug:
And at least I didn't almost accidentally kill everyone today:
And, thankfully, I didn't invent a whole new form of texting:
Finally, if you're still not feeling better, just remember that you didn't Tinder match a relative:
And Dave still loves you:
And, finally, never forget: At least you're not Dennis.
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